Mine's today! Birthdays aren't what they used to be. They were things filled with anticipation and excitement. Gifts were to be bestowed, honor given, attention paid to me. Now, however, I meet each annual celebration of the day of my birth with a mix of defeatist antagonism (if there is such a thing).
The gifts are still nice and I like the excuse to see friends and family, but on the inside I no longer find my self saying. 'Alright I am getting older!' what I hear myself saying now is, 'Oh no, I am getting older!"
To properly sum up the awfulness of this feeling I must find a musical quote worthy of the suckiness of the getting older prospect
- "Time keeps on slipping into the future" (Steve Miller Band), sucky enough but not quite right.
- "Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana." (Groucho Marx)... certainly funny but doesn't capture the point.
- "Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save." (Will Rogers) This last one will do nicely.
As kids we are in such a rush to get older that somewhere along the way we pass that impossible to reach age of perfect happiness. Running towards a finish-line so intent on getting there quickly that the joy of crossing the line is lost in the race and we are left standing among the crowd looking backwards at the race we've run.
Okay, ish... is getting older make me dour? Really it's not that bad. I think the writing process tends to flush out the ills of my mind, leaving me happy and carefree, but leaving my readers downtrodden and depressed... for this I apologize (to all 3 of my readers).
2 comments:
well, happy birthday a day late.
i can't say that i have ever felt depressed and downtrodden after reading your blog. you're doing fine.
Depression and downtroddeness, if that is a word and I think it's not, follow most of your rants. However there are entertaining.
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